daniel day-lewis spends new retirement with the family he abandoned for his acting career.

Fresh off a Phantom Thread high, D.D.L. fans were sad to hear the legendary actor announce his retirement to pursue a life in the real world. And although Hollywood has lost one angel, Daniel Day-Lewis' two boys have gained another, or as they like to call him -- "...Father?"

It was a shock to audiences everywhere when news broke out that devout thespian to all things method had a secret family outside his beloved characters, an even bigger shock to Daniel Day-Lewis himself. The Oscar winner had this to say about the surreal but heartfelt reunion --

"After my wrongful incarceration in 1975, I would send my boys a letter every week from prison, telling them how much I miss them. But they would just write back telling me how I "wrapped" on that "film" years ago, scolding me that I missed their rugby game for the hundredth time. By the time I was fully exonerated, whatever homework my boys needed help on had long been finished, and once I realized that me, Gerry -- I mean Daniel, I mean Gerry, didn't have any children, I forgot all about it, and began writing In The Name Of The Father back in Ireland, I mean Daniel, I mean, Gerry."

Day-Lewis' real life spouse, Rebecca Miller, was over the moon when she heard of her husband's retirement, excited to finally have him back home again with the kids. She recalls the reunion as something straight out of a fairy tale, her husband appearing at her doorstep with a shiny diamond ring and fifty tailor made couture wedding gowns for her to try on immediately. The actor reflects on the tough times that led to this decision, saying "when I was elected President of the United States, I had this tremendous weight on my shoulders. I had no idea how to lead a nation. Dealing with a rebellious son, a temperamental wife, all while delivering peace to a country torn apart by war -- it was impossible to take care of a second family on the side, and that tore me apart. It was a very dark period in my life. But now that I've finally left Hollywood for good and have made amends with the ghost of John Wilkes Booth, I'm excited to get back to my old life."

Miller joked about the major improvements already being made by her husband, and what a blessing it was that he actually answers her phone calls. "It's really saved our marriage," said Miller. "Before he would always ignore me when I texted or rang, apart from the time on Lincoln when he screamed that I was a witch, ordering me to cease my foul attempts to parley with the great emancipator." When confronted with these troubling claims, Day-Lewis didn't deny his wife's statements, but did defend his actions, saying "How can I answer my wife's phone calls, when my wife didn't exist? And when phones haven't even been invented yet?"

However, the seasoned actor does admit he has some regrets, including missing his father's funeral, denying his dead father was his father, and of course, the famous incident where he called Leonardo DiCaprio "foreign Irish scum" on the set of Gangs of New York, proceeding to then attack Brendan Gleeson in his trailer with a meat cleaver, wearing an American flag like a toga as he prayed the Christian Lord to guide his hand against Gleeson's "Roman Popery".

"I always thought I was just a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude," said the actor. "But maybe I was a dude who didn't know what dude I was. Maybe I was a dude who had no idea what dude I was, and claimed to know what dude I was by playing other dudes. And it took a great deal of self reflection and a weird phase of trying to convince people to let me play Harriet Tubman to understand that. And now that I've been given a second chance to reconnect with my family, I've realized I'm the luckiest oil man on Earth, I mean regular man, I mean Daniel, I mean actor, man, Daniel. I'm Daniel Day-Lewis."

Although Hollywood mourns the absence of any future performances by such an incomparable performer, fans and colleagues alike are in full support of the actor's decision to take some well deserved time off and finally learn his sons' names. And despite assurances that his retirement is a done deal, audiences are still hopeful he'll one day pull a Pesci and come out of retirement for one last ride. Will he? Only time will tell.